AntiVampire Frosting
by Kagamichihime
Summary: It's Yagari's birthday, and Kaien decides to bake him a cake. Touga doesn't want to eat it. When Kaien claims that his new, edible Anti-Vampire serum is in it, Touga is curious. The problem is, the side effect can be a bit arousing. Lemon Yaoi Shounen-Ai


**A/N: **Haha, to Nightmare Remnant! Happy belated birthday and thanks for your reviews, and our convos on Twitter XD. In a way, this sort of is connected to my last gift fic, Pure Ambrosia, though it whether or not it's a sequel could be debatable, since it's Kaien X Touga. You'll see what I mean at the end. ^^

I gave Yagari a chick's line, *with some of his charm* at one point. You'll recognize it when you come across it. XDD Despite how suggestive the fic is, I tried to make the smut a bit more classy in syntax, rather than using crude words *other than the ones Yagari loves using* since I wanted to focus on more than just the sex. XD You'll probably be able to tell, especially since I substitute words and spell others differently. Let me know how I did?

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"ღ*~+~*ღ"

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"Yagari sensei! You have to try this!"

Kaien rushed into the sitting room with a wooden spoon, dawning his signature pink apron and glasses. His hair had been tied up so he could cook dinner, but that was proving difficult with a guest in the house. Granted, Touga, in only a dress shirt and slacks, wasn't doing much else other than reviewing case files from the Hunter's Association; that and his usual chain smoking. The dark haired man looked up from a developmental research report, ominously eying the smooth, pink glob of frosting.

"Why the hell would I want to try something so pink?" Touga frowned, unable to look away from the pastel colored monstrosity.

"Because! I made it My Style. You know you can't resist anything I cook while using My Style!" Kaien beamed.

"No chance in hell."

"But I made this and a cake all from scratch for your birthday."

Kaien stuck out his bottom lip, eyes brimming with tears. Touga's frown deepened as he gave an exasperated sigh, compromising with the Chairman.

"I guess it wouldn't hurt to see it, but that's all."

"Now now, I think you'll change your mind." he smiled, crocodile tears vanishing.

The two men entered the kitchen, both greeted by the sweet, sugary scent of vanilla Kaien put away set his spatula in a bowl of frosting, nodding at the cake. Touga's stomach growled, making him blush slightly and turn his head.

"Smells delicious, doesn't it? I spent all night getting the recipe just right!"

"You're like a damn vampire, awake all night, but then you're perky all day. Where the heck do you find time to sleep?"

"Kaien Cross does not sleep, he waits." the Chairman waggled his eyebrows at Touga, who looked at him like a headcase. "You will try some, won't you? I didn't spend all that time tweaking the ingredients for show."

"If you had so much time to practice domestic tasks, how come you haven't made anything new for the Developmental Research branch at the Association?"

It was an irritation that the Head of the Association itself, who had insisted on volunteering his time to the DR branch in the first place, would so blatantly brush off his duties. Kaien might have been the most experienced hunter of them all, but Touga often wondered what other skills he had aside from being a proficient assassin. In all their years with the HA he had been kept solely in the Hunting Department. Touga had been whored around the Association, doing every sort of task imaginable. Though they were friends, and more, they hadn't had too much in-office interaction aside from hunting assignments.

"See, that's the beauty of my latest development. I've concocted an edible Anti-Vampire solution that will make our blood temporarily grotesque, in scent and flavor, to vampires."

Yagari blinked, amazed that the Chairman could even come up with something in such a short time. He had only volunteered with that branch two weeks ago, and he already had a breakthrough?

"Impressed?"

"Not really."

Liar. He pinched the bridge of his nose as he processed these feelings. He was, actually, admiring that fool.

"You always do that thing when you're lying." Kaien smirked.

"If you're so smart then how about a demonstration of your wonder drug?"

"Certainly. Just as soon as you eat the cake."

"Not gonna happen."

"It has the solution in the frosting."

"Nope"

"Will you try some if I were to do, this?"

The Chairman spun around in his usual comedic fashion, except on this revolution, he stripped himself of everything but his apron. The raven haired hunter's jaw dropped as he studied the lines of the thin, clingy pink apron, wonderfully outlining every muscle in his abdomen.

"Eat the cake, Touga."

"No Kaien, I'm not about to eat your damn toxic cake!"

"Bu-but I made it for you!"

"My point exactly."

"Grrn, you're going to eat my wonderful tasting cake, and you're going to enjoy it!"

"Like hell!!" Touga pulled a spatula out of a bowl of the fluffy pink icing, waving it in Kaien's face. "If it's so damn delicious, then why don't you eat it?

"I did, I'm trying to mnnph-"

Frosting slid off of the end, hitting Kaien squarely in the face. The pair stood there for a moment, waiting for each other to make the first move. Touga had the strangest desire to make fun of his friend, but something didn't sit right with the situation. Kaien brought a hand to his dirty blond hair, running fingers through a few errant strands of his bangs, weighed down with the sugar. He licked the pink from his fingertips, Yagari's one eye following the movement.

"You have a penchant for being ordered around, huh? Being tsun tsun can only get you so far before we switch roles..."

The hairs on the back of Touga's neck stood. He backed up to the table, almost fearing the change that was taking place.

"Y-ya know, the cake doesn't look so bad after all. Haha, maybe I'll try a piece?"

"I know you will." Kaien stated matter of factly.

He moved to the table and dipped his fingers into the sheet cake. The soft food gave weigh to the hand digging into it, chunks of the moist cake separating easily. Kaien painted his neck with the cake, the sticky frosting smearing easily. It aroused Touga's senses, and a bit more. Kaien used his clean hand to remove his glasses, not wanting to get any more sugar on the prop.

Eyes of molten gold met Yagari's icy blue one.

His glasses were off.

He meant business.

Touga gulped, unsuccessful in swallowing the heart that leaped up into his throat. Back when Kaien had first retired from hunting and they were looking for friendly civilian attire, Touga had suggested that he wear glasses. It was a personal suggestion he had, in hopes of tampering down his desire for the man. His inadvertent crush had been the main reason they rarely got to see each other at the Association. Kaien had always worn them and the dere dere persona since, unless he got serious.

Kaien smiled as he reached for Touga's hair with his clean hand, curling his fingers around raven locks. Touga leaned into the touch, rubbing his cheek against the heel of his palm and wrist. How the hell did that idiot always manage to suck him into being so docile? Damn those sexy, smoldering gold irises...

Fingers prodded Touga's lips, smearing pink along them. He shyly opened his mouth under that intense gaze, tasting the sweet sugary vanilla with a hint of Kaien. Touga licked, kissed, sucked on them, a blush rising to the surface. The iciness of his blue orb soon melted as he whimpered at the ministrations of the ex-hunter's fingers massaging into his scalp, teasing his tongue.

"You're going to eat this cake... It's really good, wouldn't you agree?" he asked, withdrawing his fingers from Touga's mouth.

"Mnhmm."

"Then lick it off."

Touga placed a hand on Kaien's waist, using the other to tilt his head back so he could get better access to his neck. The dirty blond smiled.

_"Itadakimasu."_

They could feel Touga's blush intensify. His tongue slipped past his lips, tentatively licking at the smear. He hadn't realized how hungry he had been until he began to eat the moist crumbs off of his neck. Kaien gave a breathy chuckle at the feeling of the laving tongue dancing across his skin. Touga cleaned off his neck, up along his face and back down again.

"That tickles, hmmm."

He could feel Touga smile, his attentions becoming more insistent. The raven haired hunter's arm snaked around Kaien's waist, pulling him closer. Kaien mimicked him, squeezing his nuzzling lover into the crook of his neck. Touga's panting got heavier, his tongue tingled as his lips puffed slightly, his blood became heated with desire.

"There's a side effect to this solution. It's pretty mild, but I think you should know,"

"Hm?"

Kaien pulled Touga's head back, his own golden eyes burning with mischief.

"*Satyriasis. You see, I've tested out more than my fair share of frosting..."

"Wha?"

The dirty blond attacked Touga's neck, peppering him with small nips and kisses. He pressed a hand against Kaien, trying to force him to back off.

"Nhh, stop damnit, it's embarrassing."

"That's why I do it."

His one eye glazed over in desire as Kaien ran his tongue along the man's jawline, nibbling at his earlobe. Touga shuddered and squirmed, trying to hold in a whimper.

"What are you holding back for? There's no one else here, you can be as loud as you like."

"Nhhh, but..."

Kaien pulled back to look at Touga, eyes searching his face. He pressed their noses together, rubbing them against each other before their lips touched once, twice, three times. Each kiss progressively lasting longer than the one before it.

_"Please?"_

_"Mnnnn..."  
_

Touga gave a small, restrained moan at how persuading Kaien could be. The dirty blond pulled back, and untied the ribbon holding his hair up. There was a soft wave in the tresses from where it was hugged by the ribbon, but it framed his face very attractively. He reached behind Touga, scooping up some more of the cake.

"Well if you won't be much of a moaner,"

Kaien moved his apron to the side, smearing the pink and white chunk of confection over his already hard member, bringing his fingers up to smear across his lover's lips.

"For now you can clean me off._ I got dirty. Can you help me?_" he pouted.

Oh he was good.

Touga dropped to his knees, placing his hands around Kaien's waist. He gave a long, hard lick up the shaft, cleaning off most of sweets on the underside. Kaien shuddered and gripped Touga's head, relishing the sweet sensations that one lick caused. He pet Touga's hair absentmindedly as the man worked him, giving small licks here and there, sucking and kissing the sides, eating up all the crumbles and sweet pink frosting.

_"Ahhh.... mnnnn.... so good.... Unnnnhhh"_

Kaien's toes curled as he threw his head back, giving a deep groan of ecstasy. He pressed the head of his erection against Yagari's lips, making him predictably pull away with shyness. Not letting him escape, Kaien coaxed him closer to his throbbing length, once more rubbing the tip along his mouth.

_"Mnn."_

Touga tried to reject it, he really did, but somehow ended up with his lips around the Kaien's base, sucking off the rest of the vanilla frosting from his member. Bobbing, he laved his tongue around, trying to rid it of the slippery substance. He could feel his own arousal throb painfully in his pants, begging for attention.

_"Ahh, a little more...."_

Nearing his peak, Kaien moved his hips back and forth, trying not to choke Touga too much. The kitchen was becoming pretty warm with all this activity, on top of the leftover heat from the oven.

_"I'm, gonna, come..."_

Kaien pulled out, gripping himself with his frosting hand to erratically stroke himself to climax, using the small amount of sugary frosting as lubricant.

_"Mnnnn...ahhhhhh!!"_

He came in quite a few spurts, most of it landing on Touga's face, a drop or so making it into his hair.

"Arh!"

"What's wrong, pirate?" Kaien chuckled.

"Not funny, you fucking got me in the eye. I have no depth perception, you wanna make me blind too?" Touga growled in response, rubbing at his eye.

"Heh. It's payback for getting me in the face with frosting earlier."

"It hurts." Touga pouted.

"Aww, poor baby."

Kaien kneel down to lick his seed from Touga's face, bathing his tongue over the warm fluids, collecting them up.

"Mn."

He brought his lips to Touga's, poking out his tongue to immediately part his lover's. The semen passed from mouth to mouth, Touga accepting the sweet liquids. Yagari wondered for a moment about how much sweets Kaien ate for his come to taste this way, or whether he was just still tasting the frosting.

Those thoughts were banished from his mind when the Chairman undid Touga's belt, pulling down his pants and boxers. The raven haired hunter helpfully kicked them off into a corner of the kitchen.

"Hap-py Birth-day."

Kaien sung the words before probing Touga's backside with his fingertips.

_"Unnnnhhh..."_

"Now we've got some noise! Huh, to think all I had to do was press this button right _here_,"

He pressed into Touga's prostate, petting, making him instinctively cling to Kaien as pleasure surged through him.

"So where's the volume control? Here maybe?"

A hand encircled Touga's member, thumb rubbing against the slit.

"Ahhh!!"

"Aww, you're so responsive. I've been neglecting you for far too long. I'm so sorry."

Kaien kissed his lover's forehead before moving him over onto his resurrected member.

"It's back from the dead, I see you've been neglected too." Touga laughed as he eased himself onto Kaien.

"Of course dummy, you're the only one I ever make love to."

Kaien flicked Touga on the forehead as he began pumping his member and moving within him.

_"Ahh... ahh... unnnh!"_

Touga's embrace became tighter as he rested his forehead against Kaien's. They panted heavily, watching each other's expressions, completely enraptured in their own little world...

"Smells like vanilla. Is the Chairman baking a cake?"

A door closed in the distance, voices getting louder, coming from the hall.

"Hell if I know. I'm sure he..."

Zero entered appeared in the kitchen's entryway, stopping dead on the spot, staring at the pair of grown men on the floor, spots of pink covering them both. Their oblivious world was broken when Touga spotted him, blue eye growing wide, face turning a contrasting puce. He stopped moving against Kaien, who instantly turned, wondering what could have stopped their love making. His face turned a light pink, but he said nothing. No one did. Zero's brows pushed together and up, eyes teary. He grimaced, whispering something about being scarred for life, before turning to leave.

"My winnings are valid! Let's get the hell out of here, Kaname."

"See? They smelled the solution and were repelled by it." Kaien smiled.

"Dumbass! They left because they walked in on us having relations in the kitchen! You're fucking weird!"

Kaien laughed.

"Nope, it was definitely the anti-vampire frosting."

"Get away from me you prick! _Ahh!_"

"Now Touga, we haven't finished."

"I hate you!"

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"ღ*~+~*ღ"

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*Satyriasis - Hypersexuality, the male version of Nymphomania.

Oddly enough, I think this might be the most uke I have ever portrayed anyone. O.O And he's the hardass of the series. XDDD I'm not sure if you could call this fic softcore or what. XD I actually liked the fact that there was love making, not just sex for pleasure's sake. lol

Incidentally, Matsuri Hino sensei has actually had a character wear an apron in the buff before. XD To see that and what Zero's expression looked like *a slightly more comical version, but as extreme nonetheless* when he walked in on Touga and Kaien, you can visit my profile and click the links under the new "Extras" section. ^^

Review: Tell me what you think? I would love you forever. ^^


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